Forced to be Female
The last thing I could remember was walking out of the Bank and crossing the road to my car. I had just been to see my bank manager to discuss transferring some money from one of my accounts into a high interest savings account.
I had won quite a bit of money on the Lottery, enough to change my life. I was unaware just how much my life was going to change.
I had just reached my car door when I felt someone bump into me. Then everything went blank...................!
The next thing I remember was being faintly aware of people standing around me and talking in low voices. As my sense started to return I tried to move but found I could not do so. My first thought was that I must have been in some sort of accident. My arms and legs did not respond and I tried to speak, to attract the attention of the people standing around me. I could only mumble and it only gradually dawned on me that I had been gagged.
My head became clearer and I then realised that I was lying on my back on some sort of table. I could move my head slightly and saw that my arms and legs had been strapped to the table.
The people standing around consisted of two men and one woman. They ignored me as I tried to attract their attention. It was as if I did not exist. But then I realised that they must be talking about me as the older man was looking at me and saying something to the woman, who was writing down what he said. I tried to listen but my head was still fuzzy and I could only make out some of the words.
The man was saying, "The nose needs altering a little, to make it cute and the eyes could do with being a little bigger"
As he spoke I felt him touch my face and heard him say, "The chin looks fine, not a very strong jaw line at all. Once we get rid of the beard it should do nicely"
I felt him touch my hair and heard him say, "The hairline is fine, once I have done the testes there will be no more loss"
It was only when the man touched my groin that I discovered that I was lying there naked. He felt my balls and lifted my penis, held something against it and said something to the woman, who in turn wrote on her pad.
It was only then that they turned towards me and gave any indication that they knew I was conscious. The man looked at me and spoke,
"Ah, so you have come around" He turned to the woman and said with a smile,
"Exactly on time, make a note of that, Ann"
The woman, Ann, wrote on her pad and smiled back at the man. The man turned to me and lent towards me.
"Now I want you to listen to me, Understand?" he said. I nodded my head. The man continued,
"You have not been in an accident, but you are at a special clinic. The reason why you are here is not for you to question. You will do everything we say, and you will do it without any hesitation or any questions."
The man turned to the woman and nodded his head. She came towards me with a syringe and I felt it prick my arm.
The man looked down at me and smiled,
"You will soon find that you have no alternative but to cooperate fully."
The three of them stood looking at me. Suddenly I felt a terrible pain in my stomach. It was like a fire had been lit there and it began to spread. The man smiled at me as my face contorted in anguish.
"I see you can feel the pain. Now listen very carefully, I will not explain again"
The man, who I was later to be told was Dr Knowles, told me that I had just been injected with a special drug and that it was this that was causing my agony. The drug was special because it would stay in my blood system indefinitely unless the antidote was administered.
The antidote, Dr Knowles explained, was known only to him and would only be given to me when they had finished with me. Until then the only way to stop the pain was by taking a capsule, which he held up for me to see. This capsule would stop the pain for twenty four hours at a time, and I would only be given a capsule if I had obeyed their commands.
"You understand, any disobedience and I will withhold the capsule until you obey. Obey us and you will get the capsule every day before the pain returns. Understand?"
I nodded my head. The pain was so intense, like acid eating me away. All I wanted was for the pain to go away.
I was told not to speak as they remove the gag from my mouth. Dr Knowles held the capsule in front of my face and smiled,
"When you swallow this the pain will go very quickly. But remember the pain will return in twenty four hours unless you have been cooperative in every way"
The capsule was put into my mouth, under my tongue and very quickly the pain just vanished. I was left sweating but too scared to speak. I did not want the pain to return.
I was then told that I should sleep as tomorrow was going to be very busy. They did say what was going to happen nor did I dare ask. To make me sleep I was given another injection.
I woke up the following morning to find myself still strapped to the bed and still naked. Ann was standing over me smiling. She undid the straps and allowed me to sit up on the bed.
I felt self conscious being naked and I must have blushed because she laughed and looking down at my naked body she said,
"Maybe we will get you some clothes to wear today, If you are good and do as you are told"
Ann had brought me some breakfast and I was told to eat it then to swallow a tablet. I asked her what the tablet was for, only for her to laugh again and tell me that I would soon find out. I must have looked fearful because she added.
"These tablets will not cause you any pain, they are part of your treatment"
I asked her what exactly was my "treatment", but she just said that Dr Knowles would tell me in his own good time.
After I had finished eating I was allowed to wash and clean my teeth then Ann told me to follow her. In case I was tempted to disobey she reminded me of the pain I would suffer if my capsule was withheld. I followed her.
I was led into a room and told to lie on a large operating table. As soon as I lay down the other man that I had seen the previous day came in and fastened my arms and legs to the corners of the bed. The man, whom Ann called, Eric, watched while Ann began to cut my beard with scissors.
When she was satisfied with what she had done she said something to Eric and he wheeled a trolley over to the bed. Ann then picked up something from the trolley and I felt her touch my face with the point of whatever it was.
I felt her begin to pluck at each single hair of my beard and I realised that she was using electrolysis to remove all the hairs from my cheeks and chin.
It took quite some time but gradually she covered all of my face and then proceeded to work at my eyebrows. She offered me no explanation as to why she was doing this and any attempt by me to ask or protest were just brushed aside with a reminder of the consequences I would suffer if I did not cooperate.
When she had finished with my face she took some ointment from the trolley and began applying to the whole of my body except for the pubic hairs between my legs. When I was all covered she looked at her watch and waited for several minutes.
When she was satisfied Ann then proceeded to remove the ointment using a sponge and soapy water. When she had I finished my entire body had become smooth and completely hairless.
She stood back and looked down at my naked body and smiled,
"That is much better. Now to do your hair and then Dr Knowles can take a luck at the new you"
My hair was washed and while wet Ann cut it and then dried it with a hair dryer. I had imagined that my hair had been cut short but when she had finished it did not feel so short.
When she had finished with me she used the telephone and a few minutes later Dr Knowles entered the room. He looked down at me and the felt my neck, chin and cheeks. He looked pleased with result and said so to Ann,
"Yes very good indeed, The jaw line is quite round, I should not need to alter that at all. In fact I think we might just as well proceed with the next stage right away"
As he spoke he motioned to Ann who picked up a syringe and stuck it into my arm. As I began to loose consciousness I heard Dr Knowles say something about getting the operating room ready.
When I came around the first thing I felt was an ache in my groin and in my throat. Then I realised that I could not see. I was filled with panic then realised that my eyes had been bandaged. I could hear voices around me then I felt a prick in my arm and fell asleep again.
This happened several times until finally I woke and was actually able to see. Dr Knowles was standing over me and was examining my throat and eyes. He looked at me and smiled,
"I see you are finally awake. That is good. It is about time that you were up and about." He turned to Ann and motioned to her.
"I think our patient needs tidying up a bit, will you see to that please and then we will have a little chat"
Dr Knowles left the room with Ann leaving Eric looking at me in a funny way.
Ann proceeded to wash my face and comb my hair before telling Eric to untie me from the bed.
I was then instructed to get off the bed and Ann helped me because I felt strangely weak.
"I think you are ready to see Dr Knowles now, Dear" Ann said and took hold of my elbow and led me out of the room and down the corridor to his office.
Dr Knowles was sitting behind his desk and as I was led in he motioned for me to sit down and for Ann to leave.
He looked at me and then held up a capsule.
"It is about time for your antidote, is it not? But first I want you to sign some forms." He pushed some papers in front of me and held out a pen. I was still dazed, but still suspicious as to what I was being asked to sign.
"Just sign them where I have marked. You do not need to read them. You really have no choice but to sign if you want to have this little capsule" he added.
Remembering the pain I would suffer if I did no have the capsule soon I picked up the pen and signed.
"Good" said Dr Knowles, "Now I will explain what is happening to you." He handed me the capsule and a glass of water. I gulped the capsule down. It was difficult to swallow because my throat felt so sore.
He got up from his desk and came around to stand in front of my chair. He looked me up and down before continuing.
"You have no choice at all but to accept what is happening to you, no choice at all. You have been here for nearly four weeks and so far everything is going very well indeed. That said when we have finished our work you should learn to accept the result. You see we get paid to change people and we are being paid very well to change you"
He told me to stand and led me over to a full length mirror. I looked into the mirror but did not immediately recognise the person I saw there. What I saw in the mirror was quite a shock.
The reflection in the mirror did not look like me at all. My hair had grown much longer and was now well below my ears. My face was completely hairless except for my eyebrows and these had been plucked and shaped like a girls.
My nose looked smaller and I noticed that my Adam's apple was hardly visible. In short my face looked rather feminine. I looked down at the rest of my body. It too had become hairless and looked smooth and girl like. Then I saw my groin and almost cried in anguish to find that they had surgically removed my testicles. My manhood had been taken away!
Dr Knowles smiled at me as I stared at myself in the mirror.
"You see we have been commissioned to change you into a woman and so far I am very pleased with the way things are going. Now I want examine you a little closer, stand with your legs apart, please."
I did as I was told Dr Knowles began to feel between my legs. I was aghast to discover that my penis had been tucked tightly back between my legs. I could not feel my testicles at all. I staggered to the chair and Dr Knowles followed me. He spoke quietly.
"As part of your treatment we are giving you female hormones. I have found that these work so much more effectively and quickly if the testes are first removed. So I have done that already. Your penis has been stitched down, infibulation we call it, so that it will not create even a little bulge in your panties. In due course I will remove the shaft of your penis altogether and give you a fully functioning vagina, exactly like a woman's"
I was staggered, I had been castrated and had not known, no wonder I felt so weak.
Dr Knowles looked at me said to Miss Robert,
"I think our patient should wear some clothes from now on."
Within a few minutes Ann had returned carrying a bundle of clothes. She put them down on a chair and came over to me.
My head felt light headed and I was still dazed as Ann helped me to get dressed. Dazed as I was I was startled to find that she was putting a long silk nightdress over my head. Pulling it down over my body she smiled and said,
"Now that does look pretty, Dear. I think you should wear these too."
She handed me a pair of silk panties and watched as I put them on. I was too dazed to really understand what was happening, but the panties seemed to fit me very snugly. Ann then handed me a silk dressing gown which she fastened for me. Finally she gave me a pair of slippers to put on my feet.
The slippers were open toed and had a slight heel.
Once I was dressed Ann told me to sit back in the chair while she brushed my hair. When she had finished she smiled and said to Dr Knowles,
"Well doesn't that look pretty"
Dr Knowles smiled and Eric grinned and looked me up and down.
I looked at myself in the mirror again and now I did indeed look more like a girl than ever.
I sat there stunned as Dr Knowles began talking again. He said that my "treatment" would leave me indistinguishable from any other female. I would be taught how to dress as a woman, walk and move as a woman, even think as a woman.
"And of course" he added with a smile, "You will be able to perform the sexual act as a woman!"
Dr Knowles explained that the hormones would help my body to become more feminine, it would become more curvaceous, my hips and bottom would get bigger while my waist would get slimmer. I would develop breasts and my skin would become softer just like a woman's. He said that he had already operated on my larynx so that once the soreness had gone from my throat, my voice would even sound like a girl's.
"We are being paid very well to turn you into a complete and perfectly functioning woman and we will do it, you should have no illusions about that. By the time we are finished with you, you will be so feminine that no one would have believe that you had not been born female"
"Of course" he added, "The removal of your testicles will heighten the pitch of voice a little as well"
I was almost too dazed to think, but I could hear Dr Knowles saying that my situation was already irreversible and that I had no option but to accept that from now on I was to be a woman.
"I am confident that you will even be a very beautiful woman" he said and then added, "The documents you have already signed will make your new gender legally accepted. I have taken the liberty of giving you your new name. From this day on, you are officially called, Susan, and that is how you will be addressed in future"
Ann led me back to my room.
"Come on Susan" she said, "I think you need to rest for a little while"
As we walked back down the corridor Ann told me that I should be pleased that I was being transformed into a woman, that I would enjoy myself once I accepted the fact and that I had no other choice.
Back in my room I lay on the bed trying to come to terms with the fact that I was being forced to become a woman. I kept looking at where my testicles had been, trying to see what they had done to me.
My penis had been pulled back into the space where my testicles had been and then they had stitched it flat. I soon found that I had to sit in order to go to the toilet.
I felt my face and arms. They were so smooth and free of hair. My chest was bare and smooth too and I looked at my nipples for any tell tale signs that might suggest that I was growing breasts. My nipples felt sensitive and I could just feel the skin around becoming tighter. Looking at myself from the side I imagined that I was beginning to develop a bust.
I had been in my room a few minutes when Ann and Eric came in. She told me to remove my clothes and to lie on the bed. I did as I was told and she began to massage ointment into my chest and around my nipples.
Ann explained that the ointment would help my breasts develop and would keep the skin supple as my breasts became larger. She then giggled and said that perhaps I would prefer Eric to massage me. Eric grinned and came over eagerly to take over from her.
I had to endure the feel of Eric's hands on my chest, his fingers running around my nipples. I felt them harden and Ann noticed this and smiled.
"You see, Susan, as your body changes to female, so will the things that arouse you"
She called me Susan so naturally that I felt stunned. Ann appeared to consider me as a woman already. And as for Eric, he was almost drooling as he massaged my chest.
When the massage was over I was allowed to get dressed again. Ann then told me to follow her and I was taken into a room where I was given some food to eat.
The food I was given was part of a special diet, explained Ann. It would help me to loose weight as it was intended that as a woman I would have a shapely figure.
Ann told me that I could call her Ann in future and she then proceeded to tell me that she would be responsible for ensuring that I learnt how to live as a woman. She would show me how to apply make up, walk and talk as a woman and how to dress as a woman.
"The hardest part of the treatment will be getting you used to be treated by men as a woman. You will learn that you are completely at their mercy. As a woman you will be physically weaker and your emotions will be changed. Even if you find it hard to believe now, your female body will sexually arouse men and when that happens you will have to submit to their desires"
She smiled at me and added that by the time my treatment had finished I would have such a complete female body that I would only get sexual satisfaction as a woman. My desires and urges would be female despite any attempts by me to control them.
"Once you have been given a vagina, you will want to spread your legs for any man to fuck you, even Eric here" she said grinning.
When we had finished eating, Ann said that she and I were going to watch the television. As part of the treatment I was to receive I would have to watch a number of videos which would cover many of the things that I was expected to learn in order to be a woman.
She took me into a sitting room and I was told to sit on the settee while she switched the TV on.
For an hour I had to watch a video that gave an overview of the things that I was to be taught. These included how to use make up, hair styles, fashion sense, deportment and dancing. The final part of the video said that I would be taught how to act in the presence of the opposite sex, "men".
Ann nudged my arm as the TV started showing scenes of men and women in the act of copulation.
"It will not be long before you will be moaning and groaning with delight as a man shafts you. Believe me sex as a woman is much better, you will love it"
I watched as the girl on the screen was forced to spread her legs and let the man thrust his penis into her. My body trembled as I watched the girl's body heave with each thrust and her face contort with pleasure.
I had watched such scenes on videos before and always had been aroused and had an erection. Now though, there was no response at all from my penis. It remained soft and flat fastened between my legs where once my testicles had been. I was shocked to discover that I still felt aroused, but in a different way. There was an ache between my legs and I felt myself panting as I watched the girl start to orgasm.
Ann was looking at me and smiled,
"Yes, I think you will enjoy it once Dr Knowles has given you a vagina"
Once the video was finished Ann led to a different room. I was not going back to the room I had been kept in for so many weeks but to a much nicer room.
The room was furnished like a bedroom, with curtains, chairs, dressing table, wardrobe, even a TV and tea/coffee making facilities. The room also had its own en-suite bathroom and a window that I was able to see out of.
I looked out of the window and could see the grounds of the clinic. The view was quite surprising as it consisted of well kept gardens. The clinic was quite clearly out in the country side somewhere.
While I was looking out of the window Ann told me that I would find clean panties in the chest of drawers along with some more nightdresses. I would also find other items of clothing for me to wear in due course.
"There are some books and magazines on the shelf for you to read or you can always watch the TV. I will see you in the morning and show you how to do your hair and then after breakfast I will take you to have a manicure and pedicure. Then I think we will see about having your ears pierced.
After lunch we will make a start on getting you some more clothes to wear and then we will finish with some lessons on using make up.
With luck, Susan, you and I will be able to go for a walk in the grounds before the evening meal"
Ann left me alone in the room and locked the door behind her as she left. I was clearly a prisoner even if my "cage" was now a little more luxurious.
I made myself a cup of coffee and sat down on the easy chair by the window. My mind was in turmoil at the thought that I was being changed into a woman. It all seemed so incredible and yet I had already been emasculated. Escape seemed impossible and even if I were to get free I needed to take the antidote every day and only they had it.
I sat and drank my coffee trying to think. There was a large mirror on the wall opposite and as I caught a glimpse of my reflection I was startled to see how feminine I already looked.
My reflection fascinated me for a while. It was as if the was a girl looking back at me from the mirror and it was only when I moved by body slightly that I realised that the girl was me!
When I had finished my coffee I went into the bathroom and took of the dressing gown, nightdress and panties. I studied my body in the mirror. My face and hair looked like a girls, my body from the waist up was smooth and soft, but more like a young boys.
My legs were smooth and soft and with the removal of my testicles seemed longer. I examined what they had done with my penis and was amazed that they had gotten it so flat and pulled so far back between my legs that it was almost unnoticeable.
I had to go to the toilet and this meant sitting not standing. It was strange to have to pee from a sitting reflection, but I could no longer "aim" with my penis tucked back as it was. I washed my hands and looked at myself in the mirror again.
I looked again at my chest and ran my fingers around my nipples. I was shocked to find how sensitive they were and yet it was pleasurable touching them. I tried to image what I would look like with boobs!
I put the panties and nightdress back on and the silk felt strangely comforting against my smooth skin. I put my dressing gown back on and went back into the room and switched on the TV.
I flicked from channel to channel but could only find what could best be described as women's programmes. Obviously the TV was all part of my treatment. I was to be given access to only feminine things, whether it be books, magazines or TV programmes.
Sitting back in the chair I started to look at some of the books and magazines. Some dealt with fashion hints while others covered cosmetics and jewellery. There was even a couple of dress catalogues and one on lingerie.
The lingerie catalogue was intriguing. I flicked through the pages and was fascinated by the different types of underwear women wore. There was all sorts of bras and panties and even more erotic basques and suspenders.
There were underskirts of all lengths and colours, net petticoats to make a full skirt flare out wide, and so many frills, ribbons and bows.
And I was to end up wearing clothing like these, was the thought that kept running through my mind.
I looked at one of the models wearing only her bra and a pair of very flimsy panties. Her breasts round and pert. I looked at myself in the mirror and tried to image myself wearing the same bra and panties, my breasts just as ample and pert.
Suddenly I heard a key turning in the door and Ann and Eric entered the room. She saw me looking through the lingerie catalogue and smiled,
"There are some nice things in there. You will look very pretty in them Susan, Will she not Eric?"
Eric grinned and gave me a leering look.
Ann told me to undress except for my panties and lie on the bed.
"It is time for your capsules, Susan. One of them is the antidote and the others are part of your hormone treatment. Eric will be giving these to you at this time every night. That is if you have been a good girl during the day"
Before I was allowed to take the capsules I had to lie there and let Eric rub more ointment into my nipples and breasts. He smiled at me as his fingers smoothed the cream around my nipples and I could tell that he was imaging that he was running his fingers over fully developed breasts.
Eric had nearly finished rubbing my chest when his hand began to stray closer and closer to the top of my panties. At first I thought he was going to slip his hand inside them but at the last minute he simply put his hand between my legs and softly stroked the top of penis.
I was startled to find that my body had tensed up in anticipation and at how pleasurable it was when his fingers slid between my thighs.
When he had finished Ann gave me the capsules to swallow. I could not tell which was the antidote and which was the hormone treatment. I just had to swallow them all.
I was then allowed to put my nightdress back on and after washing my face and cleaning my teeth Ann instructed me on brushing my hair. I was then told to get into bed where Ann then gave me a sleeping pill to swallow.
As they left the room and locked me in I was already feeling drowsy and I could hear music playing softly in the background and a slow monotone voice saying,
"Relax and listen to the music. As the music plays you are becoming a girl named Susan. You are feeling feminine, very feminine"
The voice repeated the words over and over again as I fell asleep.
I woke up the following morning and lay there for a view minutes as the events of the previous day came flooding back. It seemed so unbelievable and I looked eagerly in the mirror thinking that it had all been so crazy dream.
But my reflection told me that it had not been a dream. The person looking back at me from the mirror certainly looked like a girl.
Gradually I woke fully and felt the soft smoothness of the silk nightdress I was wearing against my skin. The feeling was not unpleasant!
I got out of bed and used the toilet, which confirmed again that I no longer had any testicles. I brushed my teeth and washed and all the time all I could see in the mirror was a woman.
It was strange to find my face still so smooth with no trace of a beard. I brushed and combed my hair but the way it had been cut and styled like a girl's was unmistakeable.
I made myself a cup of coffee and was sitting by the window drinking it when I heard the door being unlocked and Ann enter. She looked at me and smiled,
"Good morning, Susan. I see you are up and about already, that is a good girl"
My throat was feeling less sore and for the first time in days I felt able to speak. I attempted to ask what had happened to my throat but was shocked to find that my voice seemed so different. I had been prepared for it to sound croaky because my throat was sore but to find that it was no longer as deep.
Ann looked pleased as she heard me speak and clapped her hands,
"Oh Dr Knowles will be very pleased when he hears you speak. He has operated on your larynx to make your voice more feminine and he has done it very well indeed. You sound just like Julie Andrews. I am sure that with a little voice training you will be able to sing soprano."
Ann said that I would have to hear myself on a tape recorder to find out how feminine my voice had become and she said that she would arrange to do it later on.
I was told to put on my dressing gown and follow her. We were to have breakfast first before my treatment was to begin for the day.
I followed her to a small dining room. The food was already on the table and I was told to sit down and eat. All I was given to eat was a bowl of cereal and some toast. This was part of my diet that was to help me lose weight.
When we had finished our breakfast and had drunk a cup of coffee Ann told me that Dr Knowles was going to start by doing some measurements of my body. She took me to a room were Dr Knowles and Eric were waiting for us.
I was told to remove all my clothes and stand in front of Dr Knowles. Ann took a tape measure and made measurements of my chest, hips, bottom, waist, across my shoulders and around the tops of my arms. She called out the measurements to Dr Knowles who entered the figures into a computer.
Dr Knowles pressed a few keys then sat back with a satisfied expression on his face. He turned the computer screen around so that I could see it.
"We have been taking these measurements since you arrived and are using them to monitor the changes in your body caused by the oestrogen tablets. Oestrogen is the female hormone. The computer can predict how much your body will eventually change and give us an idea of how feminine it will look"
The picture on the screen showed the shape of my body at the time of each measurement. As Dr Knowles scanned forwards, there was a noticeable change in the outline.
Based on the measurements taken so far my hips and bottom had already gotten bigger while my arms and shoulders had become thinner and narrower. My chest was already showing small swellings around my nipples indicating that I was already developing breasts.
Dr Knowles then input a few more figures and the image on the screen changed to show what my predicted measurements would be.
"With exercise and proper dieting your waist should come down to 24-25 inches. It looks like you will have a very nice figure indeed, Susan. What do think, Ann?" Dr Knowles asked and Ann replied that my predicted figure looked very feminine.
"Oh, Susan. You will look wonderfully feminine. Your breasts should be nice and ample and your bottom and hips look really sexy"
I was astounded at how much my body was expected to change and yet it was strangely pleasing to be told that I would end up with the sort of figure that other women would envy. I realised that I had thought "other women"!
Dr Knowles told me to get dressed while he talked to Ann. Eric leered at me as I put my nightdress back on. Ann then told me to follow her and she led me back to my room.
She told me to make us both a cup of coffee while she locked me in and went away for a few minutes. She returned carrying a bundle of clothes which she laid out on the bed.
We drank the coffee I had made while Ann told me to get undressed and put on the clothes she had brought. I undressed and picked up the things off the bed. They consisted of a pair of leggings and a leotard, the sort worn by women for aerobics.
And this is what they were indeed for. I was to exercise by doing aerobics each and every morning. I put them on and Ann handed me a pair of pink trainers for my feet.
I looked in the mirror and observed that the tight leggings and leotard made it very clear how little was now between my legs. There was hardly any bulge at all now that my testicles had been removed. I looked very feminine albeit flat chested.
Ann then changed into the same sort of clothes herself. She had no qualms at all at undressing in front of me and as I saw her naked body I was breathless for a few moments.
Looking at her naked breasts and rounded hips and bottom and then at her inner thighs brought home to me how much they intended to alter my body if I was to become a woman.
When Ann had changed she took me to large room with a polished wooden floor. She put on a tape and told me to stand in front of her and to follow her every movement.
As the music played Ann went through the aerobics routine and I followed as best I could. Gradually I got better and Ann said she was pleased with me. She told me what each particular exercise was designed to do, like tighten my stomach muscles or firm up my breasts.
After nearly and hour Ann said that it was time to finish and gat a shower. She took me to the changing rooms were there was a communal shower and we both undressed and got in.
It felt very strange sharing a shower with a naked woman, especially as she was so unconcerned about my presence. Obviously to Ann I was no longer a man at all. She regarded me as a woman already.
Ann helped me to dry my hair with the hair dryer. All pat of my training I supposed. She then told me to put on the dressing gown that was hanging up behind the door while she got dressed again in her ordinary clothes.
Wearing only the dressing gown Ann took me to into another room where a girl in a white overall was standing by a wash basin. I was told to sit in a chair by the wash basin.
Ann spoke to the girl,
"This is Susan, she needs her colouring done and a full manicure and pedicure."
The girl nodded and set about washing my hair and then applying the colour. Ann suggested that my hair should be auburn and the girl agreed that it would look nice.
"It will hide all the grey for you Susan" she said as she applied the colour.
While she waited for the colour to set she stared work on my toes. She trimmed my toenails, removing the cuticles and then polished them up with a buffing pad.
Then she started on my fingernails. My nails had not been cut for weeks now and had grown quite long. She did the same with the cuticles and then shaped my nails.
Ann suggested that it would be a good idea to increase the length of my nails by adding "tips" to them. The girl agreed and when she had done this and then shaped them my fingernails were really quite long. The effect was to make my hands look even more feminine than ever, especially as my hands were now smooth and soft and completely hairless.
Finally the girl painted my toenails and fingernails with nail varnish, a soft pink colour. Ann said that they looked very nice and turned to me.
"There you are, Susan. You now have very pretty hands and feet"
My hair now being ready for drying the girl started to use the hair dryer and styling brush. While she was doing that I looked at my hands. It was like looking at someone else's hands, they looked so soft and feminine. It also felt so strange to have such long fingernails.
"Not very practical I suppose," said Ann, "But then it is not as if you will need to work with your hands in quite the same way again. It is more important for you to look decorative and attractive to the opposite sex".
By "opposite sex" I knew she meant men. Ann really did regard me as the same sex as her.
When my hair was finished Ann took me back to my room and made us both a cup of coffee. I was instructed to put on a clean pair of panties and nightdress. The nightdress was pink and long, down to my ankles. I looked into the mirror and my reflection showed me that with my hair now dyed auburn and with my fingers and toes painted I looked even more feminine.
I accepted the result with neither shock or dismay. I had no other choice but to allow them to do what ever they wanted. While the drug was in my system they could put me into so much agony when ever they wished. Already they had done so much to my body that I would never be a real man again! Being a fully functioning woman might at least be better than being an effeminate eunuch.
Once I had dressed Ann told me that I was going to have my ears pierced. She took me back to the room where my hair had been done and the same girl in the white overalls was there.
I had to sit in the chair while she studied my earlobes. Suddenly I felt a sharp prick, first on my left ear and then on my right one.
I felt the girl insert something into my earlobes and then she handed me a hanky
"I have put some gold studs in for the moment. They should not bleed very much and provided you keep your earlobes clean for the next few days they should be fine"
Ann smiled at me and said,
"Soon you will be able to wear some nice earrings. We have been told to spare no expense on your jewellery and I have already picked out some beautiful ones for you to wear"
I was given a few minutes to recover before Ann announced that I was going to be given my first lesson on using make up.
"In future, Susan, You will wear make up at all times except for bed. Helen will show you what to do and with practice you will find that it is really quite easy. Future lessons will deal with what sort of make up is more suitable for different occasions. For now though Helen will just show you how to use foundation, eyeshadow, eyeliner and mascara and lipstick"
For the next two hours Helen first showed me what to apply and when, how to apply mascara and eyeliner. She then made me practice putting on make up then removing it and cleansing my face.
It was difficult too, using my hands with such long fingernails and I made several mistakes. I was terrified that Ann would accuse me of not cooperating and that my capsule would be delayed that night. But Ann was quite patient with me and for that I was grateful.
Finally she said that she was satisfied that I could make a reasonable job of it myself.
"But for today" said Ann, "Helen will do it for you as I want you to look your best for tonight"
She did not say why I had to look my best for tonight and I sat there while Helen made me up. When she had finished and I was allowed to look at myself in the mirror the effect was quite stunning. I did indeed look pretty, in fact even I thought I looked beautiful.
I looked and even felt feminine. It is amazing what mascara and lipstick does for you.
Smiling Ann took me back to my room.
"You stay here, Susan while I go and get you some proper clothes"
She locked me in and I studied myself in the mirror again. I was beginning to look very feminine what with my hair, painted finger nails and now make up.
I heard the door unlock and Ann came in carrying some boxes. She put them down on the bed and smiled,
"Please get undressed, Susan and I will show you what you are going to wear"
I did as I was told and Ann began unpacking the boxes.
She handed me a pair of sheer grey tights and told me to put them on. Ann giggled as I struggled pulling them up and said
"You will learn, Susan. I think stockings are nicer but not until your hips get wider."
I stood there wearing only the tights. They made me look even more woman like between my legs as they pressed my penis even flatter against my groin. Ann handed me a white body shaper and told me to put it on. This too made my even smoother between my legs but it felt baggy at the top as I had no breasts as yet.
Ann then grinned and passed me two strange looking objects.
"These are silicone breasts to put inside the cups of your body shaper. You will find that they will feel almost like the real thing and will move the way your own breasts will eventually."
She helped me to insert them and the result was astounding. I now had a bosom and looking at myself in the mirror it was hard to tell that they were not real.
The rest of my clothes consisted on a white silk top, a white net underskirt and a pink and white patterned skirt. Ann said that the full underskirt would make my hips seem bigger.
Finally there was a wide black elasticated belt to help pull my waist in and a pair of black patent leather sandals with a 2 inch heel
"Now you really do look very pretty" Ann said and even I could hardly recognise myself in the mirror. I did look like very pretty girl indeed.
The finishing touches were some jewellery. Ann gave me a delicate gold watch to put on, a gold chain which she fastened around my neck and matching gold bracelets. Finally Ann sprayed some perfume behind my ears and on my wrists
I looked at the watch and found that it was a ladies Rolex!
"You see we have been told only to give you the very best of everything.
Ann made me walk around the room. I did so and at first found it difficult walk in high heeled shoes but gradually I got the hang of them. The feeling of wearing a skirt was something I had not been prepared for at all. There was something very pleasant about the way in swung and the feeling of the underskirt against my legs.
My false breasts did move like real ones and I was quite dazed at how feminine I was beginning to feel.
Anne then handed me a handbag and told me that I would need to put my compact, lipstick, hairbrush, some tissues and if I wished my cigarettes and lighter in it. I did so and she showed me how to place the strap on my shoulder.
"You will soon get used to using a handbag when you are going out" she said.
It was a minute or two before what she had said sunk in. I was going out!
"I am really going outside" I said "Where to?"
Ann told me that she had been speaking to Dr Knowles and had told him that I had been very cooperative. As a reward Ann and I were to go out to a restaurant with Dr Knowles and Eric.
Ann then lowered her voice and said,
"You have been very good so far, Susan and I am very pleased at how feminine you look. But when we go out I will expect you to act as much like a woman as possible. There is no point in trying to escape. I do not have to remind you that come this evening you will be in terrible agony if you do get your capsule.
I want you to fully understand that if you do not try hard enough to please Dr Knowles and Eric I will delay giving you your capsule. You will be witty and take part in the conversation. You will be accompanying Eric and you will act like his girl friend at all times. You now what will happen if you do not!"
She smiled and added,
"Now I have said that perhaps we can end up having a nice time and we can all enjoy ourselves"
I was told to pick up my bag and follow her to where Dr Knowles and Eric were waiting by the front door. As we arrived Dr Knowles and Eric looked at me and voiced there approval.
"You look very pretty tonight, Susan" said Dr Knowles and added,
"Ann has been telling me that you have been a good girl and have been learning your lessons very well. Now we are going to have a pleasant evening out"
Eric led the way to the car. He opened the doors for me and Ann and we both got in the back. Dr Knowles sat in the front with Eric.
The car pulled away and Dr Knowles turned around and spoke to me,
"I think Ann has warned you about being on your best behaviour. I hope that we can forget all that and just have a nice evening out"
I said that I would try my best and Dr Knowles smiled.
"You have a very pretty voice, Susan. Does she not Eric?"
Eric replied that my voice very nice, then added, "very sexy"
We drove through the country and arrived at a smart looking restaurant in the middle of nowhere. Eric got out and opened the doors for Ann and I. It felt strange being treated with such chivalry.
Dr Knowles took Ann's arm and Eric took hold of mine as we entered the restaurant. The Receptionist welcomed us and asked if we would take a seat while our table was got ready. She asked if we wanted a drink first and Dr Knowles ordered for us.
Eric sat down next to me and I was conscious of his attention towards me. Ann began talking about various things and would keep asking me questions so as to involve me in the conversation.
Gradually I forgot my predicament and found myself fully involved in the conversation. Ann and Dr Knowles must have noticed this because they both smiled at each other.
We were shown to our table and the waiter helped Ann and I to our seats. No one appeared to have any doubts about my gender at all. They were treating myself and Ann the same.
Ann said that she wanted to go to the ladies and suggested that I might go with her. I gulped at the idea of using the ladies toilet but I did need to go and it was impossible to even think of using the Gents.
I followed Ann to the ladies and tried to copy her manner as well as I could so as not to draw attention to myself.
I sat on the toilet seat and had a pee then took every care to make sure that I pulled my tights back up and smoothed down my skirt. It seemed such a complicated job dealing with the pop studs on the gusset of the body shaper.
Ann was already washing her hands when I came out of the cubicle. She smiled at me and said softly,
"Everything OK, Susan?"
I nodded and after washing my hands copied Ann as she put on some more lipstick. She smiled again and said "Very well done"
We rejoined Dr Knowles and Eric and ordered our meal. I accepted Ann's suggestion of a salad, as part of my diet.
The meal was nice and we finished it with coffee and liquors. I felt a little tipsy and became more talkative as the time went on. Our conversation was limited to music, travel and food.
Eric was becoming more and more attentive to me and began touching my knee with his hand. I was beginning to realise just how powerless I was to stop him.
We left the restaurant about 10 o'clock. This time Dr Knowles and Ann sat in the back while I had to sit up front with Eric. It was clear that Ann and Dr Knowles were more intimate than I had thought and we drove back to the clinic with Eric's hand occasionally touching my knee.
Back at the Clinic Dr Knowles had his arm around Ann's waist and he turned to Eric and said,
"Ann and I are going to my room for a nightcap. Perhaps you will see Susan to her room and see that she is settled in." He turned to me and said,
"You have been a very good girl tonight, Susan. I will leave it to Eric to see that you get your capsule"
He gave the capsule to Eric and he and Ann left Eric and I to make our way to my room. I felt very vulnerable and at Eric's mercy as he put his arm around my waist and walked me to my room.
We entered the room and I was expecting Eric to give me the capsule and lock me in. Instead Eric said that he would like a cup of coffee and had me make us both a cup.
I sat down on the chair by the window hoping that Eric would give me the capsule soon. It was nearly time for me to take it if I was to avoid the pain.
Finally I turned to Eric, who had just sat there looking at me and said.
"It is nearly time for my capsule, please Eric" I pleaded.
Eric smiled and said very softly,
"I will give you the capsule when you have been nice to me and not before. You have not got long so you had better start soon"
He came towards me as he spoke and pulled me up from the chair. I was petrified as he pulled me to him and began kissing me. I tried to resist but the thought of him not giving me the capsule terrified me and I decided that the best thing was for me to go along with him.
Eric was kissing me hard and I close my eyes as I kissed him back. His tongue was in my mouth and I tried to respond in the way he wanted. He was holding me so tight that I could feel that he had an hard on. His penis felt so rigid as it pressed into my groin.
I thought and hoped that Eric just wanted to kiss me but I was mistaken!
Gradually he pushed me to my knees until I was kneeling down in front of him. He put his hand under my chin and tilted my face upwards. He held the capsule in his hand and was looking down at me.
"If you want me to give you this, you have to give me something in return"
I was left in no doubt at what he wanted me to give him as he opened the front of his trousers. His hard, erect penis burst out right in front of my face.
At first I hesitated but another look at the capsule in his hands made me realise that I had to do it if I was to get the capsule.
I forced myself to open my mouth and very slowly touched the tip of his penis with my lips. As I did so Eric put his hands on the back of my head and pulled my head into his groin forcing me to take his penis fully into my mouth.
"Now that is what I call being a good girl" said Eric as he forced me to begin licking and sucking at his penis. It felt so big in my mouth and I could taste the juices coming from it.
Eric forced me to suck faster and harder as he became more and more aroused. Suddenly he came and my mouth was filled with semen.
He forced me to keep sucking until I had swallowed the lot and his penis had begun to shrink. Only then was I allowed to get up off my knees.
He grinned and handed me the capsule which I took eagerly. Eric said that I had given a very good "blowjob" and that any girl would have been proud at how well I had done. He then told me to get undressed and get ready for bed.
Eric left the room locking me in as I sat down on the bed to recover. He had treated me like a girl in every way and the sudden thought that he could make me do it to him again any time he wanted made me shiver!
I was still sitting on the edge of the bed, my body shaking and trembling, when the door opened and Ann came in. She saw that I was distressed and came and sat down on the bed besides me.
"What ever is wrong, Susan?" she asked as she put her arm around my shoulders.
I began to sob and she put my head on her shoulder and told me to tell her what had happened.
"He treated me like a woman" I sobbed, "Just like a woman. He made me suck him off before he would give me my capsule"
Ann stroked my hair and replied softly,
"Is that all, Susan. You are a woman now, at least you are starting to become one. You have to accept that men will want to use you. Look at me, I have just had to drop my knickers for Dr Knowles. I did not have any choice"
Ann explained that as a woman I would have to come to terms with the idea that men would want me for my body. And that I would not be able to resist their advances.
"And when Dr Knowles has given you a vagina and the oestrogen has done its work, you will even enjoy it. You will have the same desires as other women and will gladly drop your knickers and spread your legs, even for the likes of Eric"
Ann then stayed with me until I had changed into my nightdress and removed mt make up. Once I was settled in bed she told me sleep and went out locking the door behind her.
For a while I lay there thinking of what she had said. Was it true that soon I would feel so feminine that I would want to copulate like a woman?
As I fell asleep the music started playing again and the voice telling me that I was now a girl and should feel feminine filled my ears as I slept.
I woke up in the middle of the night with start. I had started to dream that I was at a party and enjoying myself. I had ended up in a bedroom with a girl and suddenly as I lay naked on top of her about to thrust my penis between her legs, my head began to spin and then just as my penis entered her vagina I suddenly swopped places and found that I was the girl and Eric had just thrust his penis into my vagina and was making me groan with pleasure.
I lay there sweating for a few minutes and all the time the music and voice telling me that I was Susan droned on. I fell asleep again.
I woke up the next morning to find Ann in my room. She waited while I showered and put on some mascara and lipstick. Ann told me to wear my aerobics kit and watched me as I dressed.
"You know Susan, your boobs are starting to show" she said as I put on the leotard.
I felt my chest and it was true. My breast were beginning to develop enough to see and feel them.
"In a few weeks you will be able to wear a bra without any padding, Susan" said Ann and then added, "And by then we should be able to notice your hips and bum getting bigger. You should be able to try stockings and suspenders then"
Ann spoke as if she believed that I would be happy at the thought that my body was becoming more and more feminine. But to be honest I did not know how to feel. I was relieved that they were pleased with me as this would mean that I would get my capsule and not have to suffer, yet at the same time it meant that I was becoming what they intended I should become, a girl!
When Ann was satisfied with my appearance we went for breakfast. Ann had not referred to the previous night and we ate our cereal and drunk our coffee with Ann telling me that I was starting to look quite pretty.
I asked her how long would my treatment last and she surprised me when she said that once my body started changing it would change quite quickly.
"And then Dr Knowles will make you into a real woman. Susan. Your body will look and function just like mine" she said.
I knew what she meant by this and took a deep breath. Once my penis had been removed it would be gone forever. Even now I could at least be made to look like a man again, but it would be too late when I had a woman's genitals that would make me perform like a woman.
Ann tried to reassure me by saying that long before then my emotions would be so feminine that I would gladly embrace my fate.
I had nearly finished my breakfast when Eric entered the room. He looked at me and smiled and my mind went back to what had happened last night. He spoke to Ann and then as he turned to leave he whispered to me.
"If you are a good girl today Susan, perhaps I will stop by and tuck you in tonight"
The blood drained from face, I knew exactly what he meant and Ann must have noticed the expression on my face for she touched my arm and said,
"You really will have to get used to the idea that men like Eric will use you whenever and however it suits them. It is the lot of women to be fucked by men and you, Susan, are a woman now!"
She was so emphatic in the way she spoke to me that I gulped and drank the rest of my coffee.
When we had finished Ann took me through the aerobics routine for nearly 2 hours. Then after freshening up I was told to change into a skirt and jumper. I again wore a body shaper with the breast implants, tights and shoes with a small heel.
Ann told me that I would soon get used to wearing shoes with a heel and that gradually I would wear shoes with even bigger heels.
"Men like to see girls wearing high heels, Susan. They make your legs look even longer and worn with stockings and suspenders or a basque men find them irresistible"
While I dressed Ann made us a cup of coffee. While we drank it Ann began telling me what fun a girl can have in choosing what underwear she wore.
"Even under just a skirt and jumper a girl can wear something really sensuous. Soft silk or satin that feels lovely next to the skin. And you can wear things with frills or lace all over and only you know how sexy you look underneath just an ordinary skirt and jumper"
Ann picked up the lingerie catalogue and began showing me the sorts of bras, basques, panties and underskirts that I would wear and she tried to explain to me what i felt like to wear them.
"Anyway" she said, "You soon be wearing them yourself and then you will find out"
I tried pointing out that some of the things in the catalogue looked impractical or uncomfortable but she just laughed
"You soon find out. It is not as if you are going to do any work in them. You wear them to feel sexy and make your man want to fuck you senseless"
"My man?" I asked
"Of course, Susan. You will soon find that you will want man. Only a man will be able to satisfy your needs. You will have them you know. The oestrogen will see to that. And you will be able to satisfy him too, no matter what way he wants you"
We finished our coffee and Ann took me for a walk around the clinic's gardens. It was breezy and the wind kept lifting my skirt. I was surprised to find it quite pleasant and even smiled. Ann saw me smile and chuckled,
"You must smile more often, Susan. It makes you look very pretty"
We passed other people walking in the gardens and I realised that some of the men were looking at me. Ann smiled and told me that no one knew why I was there and that they were looking at me because I was so pretty.
The rest of the day I spent in being taught how to style my own hair, how to walk and sit in a ladylike manner and how to gesture like a female.
My lessons finished for the day Ann took me back to my room and suggested that I read for a while. It turned out that I had to read a selection of women's books, from novels to books on fashion, cosmetics, dressmaking and the like. Ann said that I would be asked questions about what I had read and would be expected to know the answers.
Ann then turned to me and shocked me by saying that I needed to convince her that I was trying my best to learn how to be feminine. I asked how could I do this to which she replied that wanted me to prove that I now accepted that as a woman I must submit to men.
Ann said that after dinner that evening she would help me dress as feminine as possible and that I would then have to seek out Eric and "seduce" him. Unless I did so she would withhold the capsule and leave me in agony until she was satisfied that I had learnt my lesson.
I was stunned, after the previous night the last thing I wanted to do was to actually come on to him. I knew what it would mean and what Eric would expect me to do.
"It is for your own good, Susan. Once you have learnt this lesson you will be able to enjoy your femininity" She said smiling. Ann then told me that I should soak myself in the bath and when dry rub body lotion in all over. I was to put on my dressing gown and wait for her to return with my evening meal on a tray.
As I began running my bath Ann left locking the door behind her. I lay in the bath contemplating the evening to come. I was now expected not only to allow my self to be treated as a woman but to actively encourage a man to treat me like one.
Lying in the bath I was conscious of how my body was changing. The soapy water on my chest only served to emphasise my developing breasts and my hips and bottom were definitely becoming rounder. I now had the hands and arms of a woman and looking at myself in the mirror I could find nothing masculine in the shape of my face.
I did as I was told and dried myself off and anointed by body with perfumed body lotion before slipping on my dressing gown and slippers to wait for Ann to bring me my meal.
While I waited I began reading one of the books I had been told I must read, "Little Women". I had got as far as Chapter 2 when Ann came in carrying a tray.
While I ate, Ann spoke words of encouragement to me. Although she left me in no doubt that I had to "come on" to Eric, she sought to convince me that it was for my own good and that it would help me accept the fact that I was no longer a man.
Ann left me to finish eating and returned several minutes later with so more clothes for me, which she laid out on the bed.
"I have brought you something pretty to wear tonight" she said and held up a pink chiffon dress. "And I think it is about time that you found out what it is like to wear stockings instead of tights" Ann added.
Ann helped to dress. First Ann helped to put on a white bodyshaper which had underwired pretty stretch lace bra cups and lacy side panels. It was complete with 4 adjustable suspenders.
It was very tight fitting and completely hid the slight bulge caused by my stitched down penis. It also had the effect of squeezing my developing breasts upwards and giving me something of a cleavage. Ann studied my breasts and tucked some tissues inside the bra cups. The effect was to give me the appearance of having a reasonable pair of boobs and a cleavage that was real.
Ann laughed as I struggled to put on a pair of white sheers stockings with lacy tops and to fasten them to the suspenders. When I had done so she told me to look at myself in the mirror. I did so and got quite a shock.
I was getting used to seeing myself as a girl whenever I looked in the mirror, but this time, dressed just in my underwear I looked even more feminine. Not just feminine, I looked quite sexy. To my amazement I found that the feelings I had were nothing like I had experienced before.
Only a short time ago I would have found it quite arousing to see a girl with such shapely figure wearing a basque and stockings. But my feelings at seeing myself as that girl dressed so sexily were almost of pleasure and satisfaction.
In a way I was pleased that I looked so nice. A part of me was saying that if I was to be a girl I was going to be a real one and as attractive and desirable as possible. I suppose it was a case of "if you are going to do a job, do it properly"
I was still staring at my reflection when Ann nudged my arm and told me to put on the dress she had brought. It was of pink chiffon. The skirt was lined with pink silk and it had a wide neckline and little puff sleaves.
I put it on and Ann smiled as she detected the feeling of pleasure I felt as I smoothed the dress down. The neckline was trimmed in pink lace and was low enough for the tops of my breasts to show. The feeling of the soft skirt against my legs was wonderful.
My shoes were pink satin sling backs with a 3 inch heel.
Once dressed Ann watched me as I put on some make up. She made sure that I did so properly and the way I had been shown. Ann helped me to brush my hair and as a finishing touch she tied a small bow made of pink ribbon into it.
From the moment that I had looked at myself in the mirror I had forgotten the reason for me getting dressed up like this. I had just concentrated on making myself look as beautiful as possible and I had done so without realising that I was doing it.
Not only did I look like a girl I was beginning to feel like a girl. My reactions and feelings were becoming feminine and for the first time even I knew that it was true.
"You see, Susan" said Ann waking me from my daze, "You are really quite a beautiful girl already and I can tell that are beginning to enjoy feeling feminine. Now all you have to do is learn how to handle men"
Her words brought my mind back to the fact that I was dressed like this in order to offer myself to Eric for his pleasure.
" I know that it sounds like I am being cruel to you by threatening not to give you your capsule, but I am convinced that the more you act as a girl the more you will come to accept that you can only ever be a girl from now on. The sooner you accept that you are a very attractive girl the sooner you will be able to enjoy life fully"
Ann then told me how I should go about pleasing Eric. The thought at not getting my capsule on time forced me to concentrate on what she told me to do, no matter how it would make Eric react.
When she was convinced that I was ready she unlocked the door of my room and together we walked down the corridor to the communal lounge were Eric and Dr Knowles would be.
As I entered the lounge behind Ann I took a deep breath at the thought of how I was going to entice Eric back to my room.
Eric was sitting in one of the lounge chairs reading a paper and Ann and I walked over to where he and Dr Knowles were sitting. Dr Knowles and Eric looked up and Ann smiled at them,
"Good evening Dr Knowles, Eric" she said and then added, "Susan and I have just been for a walk. Do you think Susan looks pretty tonight?" she asked.
"Very pretty" said Dr Knowles turning to Eric. Eric looked at me and grinned. He looked me up and down and was obviously pleased with what he saw. He smiled and patted the seat next to his,
"Will you join us, Susan" he said.
I replied that I would be pleased to and sat down on the chair taking great care to cross my legs in such a fashion that he would catch a glimpse of the fact that I was wearing stockings.
"You look very beautiful, Susan" said Eric and I fluttered my eyelashes slightly and thanked him for the compliment.
"Ann has been helping me dress. I hope you like it" I said as demurely as possible.
Eric replied that I looked very nice indeed.
Meantime Ann said to Dr Knowles that she needed to discuss something with him in his office and they both left, leaving me and Eric alone.
Eric was quite happy looking at my legs and smiled when he noticed my cleavage. I swallowed hard the spoke,
"I hope I did not disappoint you last night, Eric. I said. "Its just that I have a lot to learn about being a woman"
Eric grinned and said that I had not disappointed him and that I was learning fast.
"What I really need" I said, "Is a man to help me understand. A man like you perhaps?"
Eric grinned again and said that he would be happy to help me.
"First of all" he said, "A pretty girl like you should be sitting much closer to the man she is with" He waved his hand motioning for me to sit on the arm of his chair. I did so and Eric patted my knee, his hand lingering there for a little bit.
"Now with you that I close I can touch your thigh whenever I want" Eric said and his fingers moved from my knee and under the hem of my dress.
"Now I can tell that you are wearing stockings. I bet that you look very nice in them. Are you wearing suspenders or a basque?"
I forced myself to smile at him and said in a low voice,
" Ann told me to wear a body shaper with suspenders. As to whether I look nice, perhaps you could tell me."
Eric leered at me and with his fingers now on the tops of my stockings said,
"I would have to see you without your dress. But we can do that later, now you and I should go for a little walk in the gardens and I will tell you how to walk with a male companion"
He stood up and took hold of my hand and led me out of the room and into the gardens. It was a surprise when Eric opened the door for me and I caught a glimpse of Ann and Dr Knowles observing us from the doorway of his office. Ann winked at me as Eric took hold of my hand again and I fell into step at his side.
"Now a man likes a girl to be close to him" he said and put his arm around my waist pulling me closer to him. "That lets me feel your body as we walk"
As we walked Eric's hand was feeling me through my dress and he obviously found it arousing. I tried to respond by letting my head rest on his shoulder. We walked for a while in silence before Eric spoke again.
"You do feel soft and feminine, Susan, and you are a very pretty girl, you know"
I thanked him and said in as sweet a voice as I could,
"Do you really think I am pretty, Eric. Will men like me, do you find me attractive?"
Eric's response was to spin me around and place his hands behind my back and pull me to him.
"Susan, I find you very attractive and men will love you" he said and tilted my face to his and kissed me on the lips. This time I knew how I was supposed to react and allowed him to kiss me hard. This time I did not try to pull away, instead I allowed him to use his tongue to search for mine.
Our tongues entwined and I began to relax. My feelings were still a little confused but I was beginning to feel pleasure at being kissed. Eric's hands were feeling my back and bottom and then the sides of my small breasts.
I felt my body responding to Eric's touch of its own accord and the response was certainly a feminine response. Small as my breasts were I could feel my nipples becoming very sensitive and my breasts stiffen.
I could feel Eric's response through my dress. He had a hard on and I could feel his penis bulging pressed against my groin.
Eric finished kissing my lips and the began kissing my neck. My body reacted even more ardently. He whispered in my ear,
" I see that you like that Susan. And your touche is getting nice and rounded. plenty for me to grab hold of."
He kissed me again and this time he pressed his body even tighter against mine and them jiggled it slightly so that I could feel his penis moving and pressing into my groin.
I found myself completely under the control of the female hormones which now filled my body. Although my mind was still largely masculine my body was dictating my responses and it was becoming feminine. To my astonishment I found that my body wanted more and wanted to be treated as a woman's.
With each touch of Eric's hands, I could feel my masculinity begin to fade and I knew that once gone it would never come back. Soon it would be gone forever.
Eric stopped kissing me and whispered in my ear,
"Lets go to your room, Susan, and I will show you how attractive I find you"
His meaning was clear and yet I found myself actually wanting him in a way I had never felt before. I was sexually aroused in a way I had never been before. My penis, no longer capable of an erection, felt numb, and what I felt in my groin was like a hollow ache that needed to be filled. All thought of having to take capsule to avoid pain had left my head.
I let Eric lead me by the hand to my room where he immediately pulled me to him and kissed me again. As we kissed I felt his hand undo the zip at the back of my dress and felt it fall down around my ankles.
Eric then led me to the bed and picking me up in his arms laid me down on top of it. He stood back and looked down at me and smiled his approval at the way I looked.
I looked up at him, unsure what would happen next but so full of feminine desires that I still did not understand.
Eric lay on the bed beside me and began kissing my neck and shoulders, gradually moving lower to the top of my breast. With one hand he slipped his fingers under the top of my bodyshaper and began to finger my nipple. The sensation was strangely pleasant and I wanted more.
I could feel Eric remove his shirt and some new found feminine instinct made me start to undo his belt and unfasten his trousers. It was only when Eric had slid his hand between my legs that we both realised that I could not do what we both wanted.
Eric quickly removed his hand as his finger touched my numb penis. But I knew that I wanted him some how and there was only one way left to me.
As Eric lay back on the bed I shuffled around until my head was in his lap. This time I had no hesitation in opening my mouth wide and wrapping my lips around his penis.
I sucked and licked with greater enthusiasm this time. This time I tried to prolong the experience and give pleasure to Eric and myself.
When Eric finally came and his semen filled my throat I swallowed it eagerly. Unlike the previous night his semen did not taste so bad and I sucked at his penis to get every last drop.
Eric pulled me back up the bed and kissed me. I felt confused and yet contented in a way I had never imagined.
"Did I do it right this time?" I asked and Eric smiled
"You were terrific, Susan. I have never had a girl do it so well. And soon I will show you what a man can do for a girl, yes?"
I nodded and was only faintly surprised at the fact that I meant it.
We lay on the bed together for a while. I felt so contented and safe that I nearly forgot about having to take my capsule.
Suddenly there was a knock on the door and Ann's voice asking if she could come in. She must have known that Eric was with me as she waited long enough for him to dress and give me a quick kiss.
Ann came in and Eric left the room giving me a wink as he went. Ann looked at me lying serenely on the bed still wearing just my underwear.
"Well Susan, I can see from Eric's happy smile that this evening was a success. Now it is time for your capsule and I think you have earned it"
I sat up with a start, suddenly remembering that I needed the capsule. Ann handed it to me with a glass of water and I took it quickly then stretched out again on the bed.
"Even more successful than I thought" said Ann, "If you have forgotten all about your capsule"
Ann then made me tell her all about my time with Eric and I had to go into detail as to how I had felt.
"I think it is time I had a word with Dr Knowles" Ann said and left me to get undressed and ready for bed.
I went asleep that night, my mind trying to come to terms with the fact that my masculinity was nearly gone and that I was almost a woman.
For the next 2 months I continued with the same routine and treatment. I did aerobics every morning followed by afternoons spent learning to dance, dressmaking and various womanly pursuits.
I was still taking the hormone tablets and their effect was becoming most apparent. I now had a real pair of breasts and a slim waist whilst my hips and bottom had filled out to give me an excellent figure.
I had lost all of my masculine strength, my arms and legs were now soft and rounded rather than muscular. My skin was soft and smooth and had that sheen to it that I had noticed on girls in the past.
My hair had grown much longer and was now well below my shoulders. Ann had insisted that I have it styled and I had learnt how to use curling tongs and a hair dryer to keep it looking nice.
I now had quite a large wardrobe including some expensive dresses and lingerie. Likewise I had accumulated many items of jewellery which I now wore regularly. Some of the pieces had been presents from whoever had paid Dr Knowles to make me into a woman and Ann said that they were all very expensive too.
It was funny, but I now felt incomplete unless I was wearing jewellery, whether it was earrings or bracelets, I automatically put them on when I got dressed.
Ann had made sure that I tried as many different styles of clothes as possible and I had begun to enjoy feeling the swish of my skirt as I walked. As my body changed so did the way in which my clothes fitted.
It took time for me to get used to the fact that body shape was changing. I now needed to wear a bra for comfort at least, my breasts were now so well developed. It had felt strange at first to have a bosom that made me look so feminine. Ann told me that my breasts had developed so perfectly that I should take pride at the fact that other women would be so envious of me.
My hips and bottom had changed noticeably too. I now had what Ann described as a perfect figure for a woman. I could even feel how my clothes fitted so much better.
Ann showed me what corsets could do to make my waist even smaller and though uncomfortable at first, the reaction I got from Eric and other men was starting to make me tingle with excitement. The feminine side of me was now so strong that I could enjoy the thought that men were attracted to me.
The more feminine my appearance became the more feminine I felt. My emotions and feelings had become almost entirely female and ever since that night with Eric I had even begun to enjoy feeling feminine.
Dr Knowles and Ann were so pleased with my progress that I was now allowed to go out of the clinic with either Eric or Ann as escort. Ann would take me shopping and if I saw any clothes or lingerie that I liked she would buy them for me.
My trips out with Eric were to get me used to being out with men. He would take me for a meal or out dancing. On these trips I would be expected to dress up in my prettiest dresses and make myself as beautiful as I could.
I had gotten used to being stared at by other men when I was out and to being treated like a lady.
Often the nights out with Eric would end up with him taking me back to my room. There Eric would use me like a woman, at least as far as he was able to. Sometimes Eric would spend the night and we would sleep together.
Wearing only panties or a G string I now looked completely female and Eric would fondle my breasts and kiss me before making me either wank him off or give him oral sex.
Each time that I failed to act like a girl I was punished by not being allowed to take my capsule on time. The pain was so intense that I would beg to be allowed to take my capsule and would promise to be a good "girl" in future. They would make me tell them who and what I was, "Susan, a girl called Susan"
Gradually my cooperation became automatic and I reconciled myself to the fact that I was becoming a woman.
I was no longer locked in my room of a night but allowed to come and go as I pleased. The threat of not getting my capsule was enough.
The thought of having sex as a woman still scared me but the hormones in my body had changed my desires in way that I knew they could only be fulfilled if I had the genitalia of a woman.
It was at this stage that after taking my shower after ny aerobics session, Ann told me not to get dressed but to return to my room and lie on the bed to wait for Dr Knowles.
I returned to the room and did as I was told. I lay on the bed naked and waited for Dr Knowles to arrive. The door opened and he and Ann came in.
"Good Afternoon, Susan" he said " I am going to explain what we do during the operation and give you some idea of what it will mean for you"
He then went on to explain that it was quite a simple operation these days and that I would wake as complete a woman as was possible. It would be painful for a day or two but that the pain would soon pass.
"To be honest most of the ladies we operate on feel so good that they do not notice the pain at all."
He explained that I would be given a pre-med which would make me drowsy and would then be taken down to the theatre. There I would be put on the operating table and my legs would be put up onto a cradle which would keep them apart during the operation.
As my testicles had already been removed the operation would start with the unfastening of my penis. My penis would then be "skinned" and my urethra exposed. This is what I urinate through. A cavity would then be made between my legs which would in fact become my vagina.
He would make it deep enough to accommodate even the biggest penis. My urethra would be "stitched" into it and the soft sensitive skin from my penis would be used line the inside of my vagina. What was left of my scrotal sac would be used to create my labia (the lips of my vagina) and my clitoris.
The shaft of my penis would be amputated and removed.
Dr Knowles smiled at me, "You will find that your vagina will look and function perfectly. Your vagina will be quite capable of penetration just as fully as any woman's. In fact you will find that because we use the nerve endings from your penis to form the clitoris you will have exquisite orgasms during sexual intercourse."
He spoke as if he was explaining something so simple and I just lay there listening. I could hear and understand what he was telling me and yet even now it still sounded so incredible when he talked of me having a vagina and that it would so like any other woman's that I could have sex as a woman and even enjoy the experience.
I was told that the removal of my testes had meant that my body no longer produced any male hormones and that gradually it would start to produce female hormones naturally. For the first 2 months after my operation I would continue to have to take hormone tablets until my body was producing its own.
He then told me that I would wake from the operation with some degree of discomfort as they would have to insert a mould into my new vaginal cavity until it had healed and that it would be a few days before it could be removed and the swelling go down. After that and provided that I was able to urinate through my new vagina properly I would be allowed up and about.
He told me that I would have to use a dildo to help my vaginal cavity heal properly and to keep it open. The Doctor added that most women found this highly pleasurable as the dildo would cause me to have an orgasm very easily.
After a few months my vagina would be fully healed and I would be ready to have sex as a woman.
"You will find that you enjoy sex just like any girl, especially the penetration of your vagina. You will have orgasms exactly like any other girl and will be brought to climax in exactly the same way."
"When you are ready for full sexual intercourse, I will find a good lover to give you your first shagging, I promise. After that you will be taught all the sexual techniques and sexual positions we can teach you so that you will become the perfect woman".
Ann came over to me and smiled as she took hold of my arm and gave me an injection.
"Well Susan, soon you will be a whole woman and ready to start a whole new life."
I gulped, reconciled as I thought I was to the fact that I was to be changed into a woman. Now the time had come, I felt dazed. Once they had performed the operation there could be no chance of me ever becoming a man again. Even now I could have looked like a man with synthetic testicles, but once my penis had been amputated that would be it.
The injection was already making me drowsy as I was lifted on to a trolley and wheeled down to the operating theatre. There was no escape for me now.
In the operating theatre I was lifted on to the operating table and my legs were spread wide apart and a tube was pushed into my mouth. The anethsetist gave me an injection and I was told to breathe deeply and count backwards from a 100. I focused my eyes on my penis as I took a deep breathe, This was to be the last time I would see it and the last time that I could call myself male. I had just said "100! when I fell asleep.
I dreamt, and my dreams were both pleasant and terrible. I was floating along on the clouds wearing a gossamer thin gown and feeling so at peace. Then I was plunging down and I felt my body being pulled and pulled. The pulling was centred on my groin and became so intense that I thought I was being turned inside out, then suddenly the pulling stopped and I floated free again.
I woke and felt a sharp stab of pain between my legs. I lay there not knowing where I was, only aware of the intense pain in my body. I heard a voice say,
"Ah you are awake. I will give you an injection for the pain now"
I felt a movement between my legs and the slowly the pain began to ease. As it eased my mind started to clear. My operation was over, I was a man no longer! From this day on I would have the body of a woman and have to do all the things that women did, and had done to her!
Ann spoke again,
"You will feel better soon, Susan. Try to sleep a bit"
I did sleep and when I woke a second time my head was much clearer. Dr Knowles was standing over me and smiled,
"I just want to see how you are, Susan" he said and lifted the bedclothes from me.
I tried to see what had been done to me but I was still covered in dressings. A tube ran from the top of my thigh.
"Very nice, Susan. You will have a very nice vagina when the swelling goes down. One of the best I've done. You really are a woman now, there's no going back!"
Although I knew my penis had gone and with it the last trace of my masculinity, I tried to sense if it was still there. But the sensation was strange. Instead of feeling as if there was anything between my legs I now felt as if there was a void.
"When can I see" I asked the Doctor. He smiled and told me that the swelling should have eased by the morning and that I would be able to examine my vagina then.
"Don't forget that it will be some weeks before your pubic hair grows again. When it does you will look and feel just like any woman between your legs"
Two days later I had my dressings and tube removed and for the first time was able to see how I looked between my legs. Even though I knew what to expect, I was still shocked at what I saw.
Though swollen I now had a vagina where once I had a penis. I had not realised how much space my penis and testicles had occupied. With their complete removal my legs even looked longer than before. Despite the swelling between my legs I now looked exactly like a woman.
My new vagina looked like any other woman's and it seemed so perfect in every way that I could not resist touching it. As my finger touched my labia I trembled, it was so sensitive that I felt my whole body shake.
"My God" I thought,"If my finger feels like this what will intercourse be like" The fact that I could now be penetrated by a man was now suddenly so real to me. I suddenly felt very vulnerable.
That morning I had my first pee through my vagina. I had long since got used to sitting rather standing to pee but this was different. I could not direct the flow at all now and I peed just like every other women.
The rest of the day I was allowed to use the lounge, wearing just my nightie and dressing gown. Walking was different too. It was so much easier and I found that I now walked naturally in a feminine way.
The following day I felt even better and after Dr Knowles had examined me I was told that my vagina was healing nicely.
"You should start to use the Dildo from now for the next month. You will not be ready to have sexual intercourse for that time, at least not full penetration."
Dr Knowles told me that Anne would show me what to do with the dildo and that I should use it at least twice a day for half an hour. He also advised me to wear stockings rather than tights for at least another week.
After he had gone I was allowed to get dressed for the first time since my operation. My panties now fitted me so tightly, no little bulge at all.
Once dressed in stockings and a pretty skirt and blouse I was allowed to walk in the clinic grounds. I stepped outside for the first time as a complete woman. Passers by could have had no idea of what I had undergone and could only see me for the girl that I really was now.
I realised that my reaction to men had changed too, I could now be fucked by them and a tingle went down my spine, if a man so much as looked at me. I could almost picture them parting my legs and thrusting their penis in to me. I was both scared and thrilled at the idea.
After a walk I returned to my room where Ann showed me how to use the dildo. She explained it's use very thoroughly and said that I would enjoy the experience.
"I'll leave you to do it in private" she said as she left the room.
I removed my panties and lay on the bed with my legs apart. Ann had told me to rub some KY jelly around my labia, which I did. I picked up the dildo and looked at it. The dildo was about 9 inches long and shaped very much like a man's erect penis.
As instructed by the Ann, I began by gently stroking the edges of my vagina with the dildo. To my surprise the pleasure this gave me was so delectable. Then I began to gently insert it into my vagina. Almost at once I felt my head spin with sheer ecstasy.
I was amazed at how deep I could insert the dildo into my vagina and the deeper I inserted it the more blissful the sensation. My body was trembling with enjoyment as I moved the dildo in and out of my vagina.
Of course I had masturbated as a man. But the pleasure then came suddenly and was over. Now as a woman I felt the exquisite pleasure of a multiple orgasm. The idea that a man would now be able to bring me to such a climax frightened me and at the same time thrilled me to the core.
I would have continued using the dildo for hours more had Ann not returned. She smiled at me as I put my panties back on and whispered,
"That's the best part of the operation."
I asked her how deep my vaginal cavity was and she told me that I had been very fortunate as Dr Knowles had been able to make it as deep as most women's. It seemed that I would easily be able to accommodate even the most well endowed man and the very thought made my body tense.
It was starting to come home to me just what had happened to me. From now on a man could make love to me just like any other woman. My body was now that of a girl and capable of being penetrated by a man. And men would want to make love to me, Ann told me. And I would enjoy it because I had a woman's body.
I was allowed to spend the next week relaxing and letting my body heal fully. I walked in the gardens and sat around the lounge or my room reading and watching TV. All my reading material and TV programmes were still restricted to those considered more suitable to women and by this time I had actually started to find them interesting.
The romantic novels that I had been given to read now took on a different meaning. I found reading the passages dealing with sex took on a new light now that I too could perform sexually as a woman.
I mentioned this to Ann one night when she was sitting with me in the lounge. Ann laughed and said that if I thought reading about was different now, I should try watching a blue video. She promised to bring me one to the my room later that night.
"If you watch it while using the dildo, you will find it even more interesting" giggled Ann.
I had not seen Eric since my operation and I wondered what he would be like now that I had finally become a whole woman. Ann said that he had been away doing a job for Dr Knowles, and then she smirked and said,
"Now I wonder why you want to see Eric? Well soon you will be able to give him more than just a blow job"
I asked if Eric would be the one that Dr Knowles had told me would teach me how to enjoy sex as a woman. Ann said that Dr Knowles might allow Eric to "deflower" me but that there was someone else, a sex therapist, who would show me how to get the most out of being a woman.
"I am glad that you are showing such a keen interest in sex, Susan. It makes everything so much easier"
I replied that it was simply that I had no alternative but to be willing.
"Thanks to you and Dr Knowles, I have all the sexual urges of a girl and I know there is only one way for me to get satisfaction now. It is not that my mind wants sex, it is my body that is crying out for it and there is only one way now for me to have it, and that is as a woman"
I was still sitting in the lounge when Eric entered. He came over to me asked how I was. I told him that I was fine. I then realised that I did not know if Eric knew that I had been operated on.
"I had the operation a few days ago, Eric, Did you know?" I asked
Eric looked at me and smiled, "Yes I did know. Dr Knowles says it was very successful. That you are perfect now"
"Well I am certainly different" I said, conscious now that Eric knew that I could have full sex as a woman. It was a funny feeling knowing that Eric could now thrust is penis into my vagina and bring me to climax in a way that I had done to woman in the past.
Eric was busy and said he would come along to see me later. He said it with a twinkle in his eye and I hoped that he knew that I still had to wait some weeks before I could have full sexual intercourse.
I returned to my room and lay on the bed and watched some TV. As usual it was a woman's programme and was about hairdressing. I started to picture myself in the different hairstyles. My hair was now so long that I could choose almost any style.
After a while I decided that it was time for my exercises with the dildo. I was getting to like using it as it gave me so much pleasure. But I had been told not to overdo it, especially at first.
I removed my panties and tights and lay on the bed with my legs apart. Slowly I began to caress the outer lips of my vagina with the dildo. This was enough to make me tingle with excitement. Gradually I allowed myself to insert the dildo further and further into my vagina.
At first my vagina was a little sore but as I slid it in and out the soreness faded away to be replaced by sheer pleasure. I was still astounded at how far I could get the dildo inside me.
I began to climax and let myself relax and enjoy the sensation of pleasure when I was conscious of the fact that someone had entered the room.
It was Eric. He looked down at me and smiled,
"You look as if you are having fun, Susan" he said, "Mind if I join you?"
I was still in state of ecstasy and hardly able to speak. Eric bent down and kissed me as I continued to slide the dildo in and out.
"It might be more fun if I did it for you" said Eric. "But first I think you should take off your clothes so that thy do not get crumpled"
Eric helped me to undress and I lay back on the bed wearing only my jewellery and a smile. Eric looked down at my naked body and grinned at me.
"You are perfect" he said as he looked down at my new cunt. "Your body is perfect in every way now"
Eric then took off his clothes and lay on the bed besides me. He picked up the dildo and began by stroking the inner part of my thighs, gradually moving closer and closer to my vagina. My senses of anticipation was tremendous. Having no control over the dildo made the pleasure even more acute.
When Eric finally touched my labia with the end of the dildo my entire body shuddered with delight. Then he began to slide it into my vagina, very gently but with such affect that I began to climax at once. I pressed my head back in to the pillows and just revelled in the sensations I was feeling. Eric was pleased too I could feel that his dick had become hard and erect.
I suddenly wished that Eric was using his dick inside me rather than the inanimate dildo.
As Eric carried on sliding the dildo in and out I began to stroke his dick for him. I could feel him respond and heard him sigh with pleasure. At last we were able to give each other pleasure.
"Lets try it this way" said Eric and I willingly let him manouvere my body around until we were lying on our sides but with our feet against each others heads. In this position Eric was able spread my legs and insert the dildo inside me again while I now found that Eric's penis was close to my mouth.
I wrapped my lips around Eric's penis and began to lick and suck as Eric slid the dildo in and out of my vagina. I was in a permanent state of climax and enjoying every minute of it. I could feel Eric responding too as I sucked and sucked his dick.
By the time that Eric shot his load and my mouth filled with his semen I was so delirious with pleasure that I was sorry it was nearly over.
Eric turned my body around and we lay together on the bed. I kissed him and smiled,
"Thank you, Eric Dear" I said "That was wonderful"
Eric grinned and kissed me back.
"And soon I will have you properly, Susan. And then you will find out what it feels like to have man inside you instead of a piece of plastic"
We lay together for several hours. Eric held me in his arms and I felt so safe there. I felt like a woman and wanted to be loved as a woman. There was no trepidation at the thought of being shagged any more, my body was that of a woman and it ached for a man.